Why Some People Find It Easy To Be In Healthy, Loving Relationships.
Here some of the characteristics of this special crowd that despite of probably some failures they thrive in the realm of love.
Some people have an easy love life because they are just lucky. I have found there are two major reasons for it. First, they are lucky enough of being raised by confident, loving, present parents that were able to provide a secure attachment style. And/or second, their partner is a person with similar emotional characteristics. This doesn’t mean they haven’t gotten rough moments in life but they have the emotional strength to easily bounce back and take responsibility to overcome any emotional obstacle.
Yes, I’m saying it here “sometimes a happy love life is a matter of luck”, but it doesn’t meant that you can not change your luck once you are aware of what has to be changed or improved.
Now let's dig into the rest of the characteristics of people who are in loving and fulfilling relationships do in a conscious or unconscious manner.
They stay focus on their vision despite the pressure, the hardships, the roadblocks and the disappointments as if achieving their vision is the only possible choice
They are more afraid of NOT getting what they want than trying and fail in the process
They muster the courage to do what has to be done not because they are fearless but because they know there is always something better on the other side of their fears. And even if they fail they know they will raise and the next time they will have more experience to do it better
They are not just eternal students; they are also eternal go-getters. Theory is great, but it's nothing if you don’t actually act upon
They quit the wrong situation faster because they have a stronger self-compassion system
They trust themselves but they also trust others. This is usually thanks to their secure attachment style.
They have realistic expectations, goals and dreams about how their love life will be. I met once a lady who told me that she couldn’t find a man who loved her the way she wanted. She told me couple of stories of her exes. For her those men didn’t do the things that she “expect” them to do for her. Those were things like; he never expressed his feelings with words. When I asked her if they did express their feelings with actions? She said yes, but that didn’t count for her so she was always disappointed.
They have good intentions even if they make mistakes. I'm going to make a little side note on this point because this is actually tricky, bad people usually don’t think they have bad intentions, they don’t see themselves as bad people at all because they are narcissist and egocentric and sometimes they simply have hard time seeing their actions as mean. They actually have the best of the intentions but just with themselves. Should I add that these are the people you have to run away fast from?
The truth is that most of us are not that lucky to just find love easily and have the life of our dreams, we actually have to be learn as adults how to master love. I hope you got inspire by the things others do or have different and go and claim your right to have the love life of your dreams.
“We are slaves to whatever we don’t understand”
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